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Vindicated

Last Friday, I decided I didn't need to wait for the new year, to start having a devotion every morning again. I had been slacking "due to the busyness of the holidays" and was really missing the Lord.

So...being the fate tester I am, I opened my Bible to Psalms 26 (since it was the 26th day of the month) and started reading:

"Vindicate me, O Lord..."

Yes, Lord! This is perfect! Please vindicate me! Clear me of blame, give me a fresh start!! Then I read on...

"...for I have led a blameless life; I have trusted in the Lord without wavering."

Errrrrrrrrrrrrrr (sound of a car slamming on the breaks)!

Maybe I should try the 26th chapter of another book?? But just before I turned the page to find something I thought would be a little more suitable to read, I heard a gentle voice telling me to read on.

So I did.

"Test me, O Lord, and try me,"

"for your love is ever before me,"

"Redeem me and be merciful to me."

Wow. As I sat there awestruck I let the Lord redeem me and remind me that every morning I am given another chance to get things right. To be more dedicated to Him, to be a kinder wife, a more patient mother and to make better decisions! And what perfect timing. With the new year right around the corner the Lord showed me that this can be a Psalm I claim for the New Year. How incredible is He!!?? That He would find favor in ME? A broken, imperfect, impatient, judgmental, tongue- flapping woman!

Thank you God for vindication through your perfect Son, Jesus Christ!

Manoah's Wife's Story

And there was a certain man of Zorah, of the family of the Danites,

whose name was Manoah; and his wife was barren, and bare not.

Judges 13:2

Not much is known about Manoah's wife. We don't even know her name. But in Judges 13 verses two through 25 we learn about a special visit that leads to the birth of a remarkable and well known man, Samson.

An angel of the Lord appeared one day to Manoah's wife and told her that even though she had been barren for a long time she would soon conceive and have a son. The angel gave Manoah's wife specific instructions. He told her not to eat anything that wasn't kosher, not to drink wine and to never cut her son's hair because he was to be a Nazirite, a special servant of God, that would begin to deliver Israel from the Philistines (vs. 3-5).

Manoah's wife, not sure of what she had seen or heard, ran back to Manoah and told him of her encounter. She explained that a man who was almost too bright to look upon told her she was pregnant. And though she didn't ask the man who he was or where he was from, she thought surely he was from the Lord. Manoah hearing this from his wife prayed and asked God to send the man back to give them more instructions on the upcoming birth of this baby they were now expecting.

Some time later when Manoah's wife was alone again in a field the man returned. Manoah's wife quickly ran to get Manoah and brought him back to the field where the man was waiting. Manoah asked the man if he was the one that had delivered the pregnancy news to his wife and the man replied, "I am."

I. Am. Two words that speak volumes.

Manoah asked if there were any other instructions they were to follow (as any good new father should do ;) but the man only repeated what he had already told Manoah's wife. Manoah asked the man to stay and offered him something to eat. The man told Manoah he would not eat but if Manoah brought something he should offer it as a sacrifice to the Lord. Manoah and his wife made a sacrificial offering to the Lord and as the flames were leaping toward Heaven the man ascended into the fire. It was then that Manoah and his wife were convinced they had been visited by the Lord.

What are we willing to give up for the Lord and His will in our life? Are we willing to give up alcohol, junk food or an unhealthy lifestyle? What about a career, an expensive car or a dream home? Or maybe just the comfort of complacency. One thing is clear, the Lord delights and appreciates our sacrifices when given in His name. Praise the Lord they are no longer required to enter into His Kingdom but what will we sacrifice out of love for Him? Maybe it is that "want" we hold onto that keeps us from receiving the full blessings of the Lord. Let it go and see what happens.

And the woman bare a son, and called his name Samson:

and the child grew, and the Lord blessed him.

Judges 13:24

Lessons Learned As A Foster Mom

What being a foster mom has taught and still is teaching me...

1. A quiet home, is a boring home.
2. It's ok if the house gets dirty.
3. All clothes match--in some way or the other.
4. Let your heart be your eyes (see each child as beautiful).
5. A gentle reprimand goes further than a loud scolding.
6. Hugs are habit forming.
7. A smile across the room speaks a thousand words.
8. Allowing little ones to "help" is rewarding for everyone.
9. All children are good, some are just misunderstood.
10. Meal times are supposed to include laughing.
11. Let your heart be your ears (accept the loudness of playing, laughing or crying).
12. You don't have to do all the laundry in one day.
13. Accidents happen, and it really is ok.
14. "I love you" are the only magic words.
15. Red and yellow, black and white, they are all precious in your sight.
16. "Disability" means extra love.
17. Let your heart be your mouth (say kind words).
18. Noggin (preschool cable network) is a God send.
19. Children think you're beautiful even without make-up.
20. Not to be selfish.
21. No child was/is an accident.
22. Rocking a child or rubbing his back works better than any sedative.
23. Changing a dirty diaper, in a room with a vent, makes ALL the difference.
24. Let your heart be your hands (give hugs and pats).
25. Paper plates are fine china.
26. Smiling, nodding, pointing and gesturing cross any language barrier.
27. Let your heart be your nose (see number 23).
28. Jesus welcomed the children, so should we.
29. Letting go is a growing opportunity.
30. To be flexible (mentally and physically).
31. God really is in control and has purpose to His will.
32. Not to sweat the small stuff.
33. To be thankful for my parents.
34. It's ok if the car gets dirty.
35. That my husband is incredible!

Check back as I'm sure the list will continue to grow...

Rachel's Story

"When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he opened her womb,

but Rachel was barren."

Genesis 29:31

Most of us know the story; Jacob fell in love (at first sight) with Rachel. She was the beautiful, younger daughter of Laban. Jacob made arrangements to work seven years for Laban in exchange for Rachel's hand in marriage. Remember the trick Jacob pulled earlier on his father Issac? "Yes father, this is your son 'Esau' bless me please..." Well, what goes around, comes around and seven years later a huge wedding party was planned and carried out. But to Jacob's surprise he wakes in the arms of Leah, not Rachel. When he confronts his new father-in-law about the deception, Laban informs Jacob their custom is to marry off the oldest daughter first. Laban tells Jacob if he goes along with the marriage plans he will give him Rachel as well at the end of the wedding celebration (a week later). Jacob complies and is rewarded with his love, Rachel.

Although it was customary for a father to marry off his daughters according to their age, I can only imagine how Leah felt when she realized it was her younger sister, Rachel, that Jacob really wanted. In no fault of her own she was stuck in a loveless marriage. God knew this and felt for Leah. He "opened her womb" and blessed her with several children. Rachel, not realizing this was God's doing, became jealous of her sister and was desparate to have children of her own. In Genesis chapter 30 and verse one, she tells Jacob, "Give me children, or I'll die!" How many times have we felt that way? I can recall a time I told my husband I didn't think I could handle another one of my friends getting pregnant and his wise words to me were, "Well, either you need to pray they stop getting pregnant or that you get pregnant." Needless to say that wasn't what I wanted to hear. Just as Jacob's response to Rachel's complaining probably wasn't what she wanted to hear either. Jacob told Rachel that he was not God and that he (Jacob) had not kept her from getting pregnant.

Sometimes it is hard to celebrate the pregnancy of a friend or a sister's. You put on your best smile and congratulate them all the while feeling like a fraud and wondering, "will it ever be my turn?" It can be especially hard when you have friends and family members who seem to get pregnant by just brushing hands with their husbands. Regardless, we are reminded in first Corinthians that love does not envy. And the majority of times it is those friends and sisters who are pregnant that are praying the hardest for us to conceive as well.

Rachel definitely had a hard time dealing with her sister's pregnancies and instead of celebrating with her, she proceeded to "build" her own family by using her maidservant as a surrogant mother. This began another rivalry between the sisters and two maidservants later, Jacob had a house full of kids. I like to think Rachel eventually realized that waiting on God was the best thing she could do as well as appreciate a lesson in patience. I also like to think Rachel began to seek God and his will. Whether she did or did not seek him, the Bible tells us in Genesis 30:22 , "God remembered Rachel; he listened to her and opened her womb."

I don't think God "forgot" Rachel. I think he was giving her time to mature in her walk with him. In the beginning she was crying and complaining to her husband and demanding that he give her a baby. She didn't realize she was asking the wrong person. Now, she was asking God for a baby and he, the fertility expert, listened. Rachel gave birth to a baby boy and named him Joseph for God had taken her disgrace away.

Rachel's story is important because it reminds us that God does not forget the barren. Her story is also important because it shows that even though we make mistakes, he still desires to bless us. In your struggles to conceive and to be happy for those around you who succeed in doing so, let me encourage you that the Lord truly loves a cheerful heart and if you can just take that step toward contentment God will meet you there and carry you the rest of the way. He has a plan for you and it is the most perfect plan. Wait on him and let him show you great and mighty things you never thought were possible.

What's For Dinner?

Fish and Chips

1/2 cup plus 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1/2 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon fresh lemon zest
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1/2 cup club soda water
1 egg
1 1/2 pounds of white fish fillets (pretty much any kind will work)
Vegetable oil for frying

Mix first six ingredients in large bowl. Whisk in soda water then egg.
Cut fish into strips or nuggets then season with salt and pepper.
Heat oil over medium-high heat (360-400 degrees).
Dredge fish pieces in flour then dip in batter allowing excess to drip off.
Fry in 1/2 inch of oil until golden brown. Place on paper towel-lined dish.
Serve with fries, sweet coleslaw and special sauce for dipping (recipe below).

"Special Sauce"
3 tablespoons mayonnaise
2 tablespoons ketchup
1 teaspoon mustard
1 teaspoon sweet pickle relish
1 teaspoon horseradish sauce (prepared)
1 garlic clove minced

Mix well.

Adoption Day

He predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ,

in accordance with his pleasure and will. Ephesians 1:5

This morning when I woke I wondered if today would seem different. Would the birds sing a little louder? Would the sky be more blue? Would the kids all have (supernaturally) good behavior? But as we got dressed and prepared for the hour long trip to the court house it quickly became apparent that today was going to be no different than any other day. The birds were asleep, the sky was dark and cloudy and the kids were behaving as they normally do--wanting to watch television instead of getting ready, claiming found toys ("mine!"), and dragging their feet when told to get dressed, get down or simply come here! The only thing different about today was that we all woke up an hour earlier and that--as you can imagine--did not set the mood for a wondrous, magical day.

With extra diapers, wipes, granola bars, Cheerios and juice boxes packed, we marched down the stairs and loaded the van. As we drove down the uncrowded highway I glanced in the baby-view mirror and caught a glimpse of Easton as he stared out the window watching the rising sun. His eyes were still sleepy and his chubby cheeks dimpled as he smiled at me when he noticed I was looking at him. As far as he knew we were just going for another ride to church, school, the grocery store or to one of the many other places we go on a daily basis. Regardless of where he thought we were going, his eyes were not crying tears of gratitude, he didn't tell me he was happy to be a part of our family, nor did he speak a single word on why he thought it was such a great idea for us to be following through with God's plan. He was just enjoying the ride.

As I focused back on the drive I noticed the song playing on the radio was not one of the typical Christmas carols that our local Christian radio station plays this time of year. The station had "interrupted regular Christmas programming" to play a song that demonstrated the type of music they play throughout the year. The song that was playing was titled Miracle of the Moment and sung by Steven Curtis Chapman. It was at that moment, I realized the miracle was not that we were on our way to adopt Easton, but that he had been my son all along. The miracle was making the connection that before Easton's heart began to beat, while he was still God' s secret, he was intended to be my child. The court papers, case managers and emotional roller coaster rides over the last two years were just the world's way of putting its two cents in on something God had planned from the beginning.

When we arrived at the court house I was amazed at the calmness I felt. Compared to other trips there, this time I wasn't afraid of the outcome of the hearing or worried about running into Easton's biological family. There was no anxiety as we entered the doors and went through the detectors. We were greeted with smiles of understanding and made our way to the third floor to wait for our attorney. --This is where the supernaturally good behavior would have come in handy but as I mentioned above, this day was no different than any other.--The boys got bored and the baby was squirming to get down and crawl on the floor that I'm sure was covered in over a thousand different types of bacteria, not to mention filth. Eventually we made it into the court room and were sworn in. Our attorney asked us the typical adoption questions one being, "Carrie, why do you want to adopt Easton?" To which I answered silently with tears. The judge said with a smile, "I think that says it all." The hearing lasted all of ten minutes and before we knew it we were back in the van headed to a family favorite restaurant.

On the way home I thought of all the "miracles of the moments" we've experienced over the past two years. The first, accepting a scrawny baby boy into our home--they could have called someone else, we could have said no. The next when I told a friend I had a feeling this baby was going to be with us for a while--only to have the baby leave three days later. Another moment came when Eric prayed at our church altar for the baby's protection as well as salvation. The next miracle was five weeks later when Easton came back to us. Other miracles were the amazing support and prayers we received from family and friends, the health of Easton and the unexpected but wonderful blessing of another pregnancy. A big miracle came on September 9, 2006, when parental rights were terminated making Easton free for adoption. And finally today, December 20, 2007, 729 days after Easton came back to us, officially adopting him into our family.

I know that just as we were predestined to be adopted into God's family through Jesus, Easton was predestined to be adopted into our family according to God's pleasure and will!

For information on adoption visit Steven Curtis Chapman's website: http://www.shaohannahshope.org/