Sarai's Story

Now Sarai was barren; she had no children. Genesis 11:30

Sarah has the honor of being the first barren woman mentioned in the Bible. It was apparently a big deal that this woman, who was married to Abram, was barren because just about every time her name comes up, somewhere soon after follows the words, "barren," "childless," or "without children." How is that for salt in the wound? I can picture her walking toward her neighbor's tent and hearing someone say, "Hey girls, here comes Sarai, you know, the one without kids..."

In a time of history where people were 'begatting' people, Sarai sat around watching sister after sister, friend after friend, cousin after cousin and even niece after niece have babies. While others were joyfully expecting, she was sorrowfully wishing. I wonder if those around Sarai felt bad announcing to her they were pregnant again since it was widely known that it was the desire of Sarai's heart to have children and the Lord had even renamed her husband, Abraham because he was to be the "father of many nations." Here they were, getting up in age and not a single child to call their own.

In Genesis 15, Abram was expressing his fear of his estate being left to his servants since he had no children. The Lord told Abram not to worry because his offspring would be as the stars in the Heavens. Abram accepted this but apparently Sarai did not. Being the clever gal she was she set out to take matters in her own hands. In Genesis 16, Sarai makes plans to build a family through her maid Hagar. But what a mess she made for herself! Hagar got pregnant with Abram's son but both women began despising each other because of it. The son Hagar had was never considered Sarai's own and she was back where she started, childless and now with a heart full of jealousy and resentment.

Later on in Genesis 18, Abram, now Abraham, is visiting with some men (who he later realizes was the Lord) when they tell him that his wife would soon become pregnant. Sarai, now called Sarah, was eavesdropping and began to laugh when she heard the men's statement because she was old and well beyond child-bearing years. When confronted on why she laughed, she denied it. Perhaps she was embarrassed by her lack of faith.

Finally in Genesis 21, Sarah became pregnant and at the very time God had promised Abraham she would. The promise God gave Abraham was not a promise given to all of us, however, when the desire of Sarah's heart lined up with the will of God, her prayers were answered. Oh, if we could only see that the Lord's will and timing are perfect! We must be patient, have faith and be obedient to the Lord's will in our lives. He wants to give us the desires of our hearts, but only when they are in His will. Seek Him and pray the desires of your heart are the desires of His will.

My Story

At age 19 I was diagnosed with endometriosis, a non life-threatening disorder that sometimes causes infertility. The news didn't bother me. I didn't have to take medications, follow a strict diet or take up exercising. It wasn't until after my second surgery (at age 21) to remove ovarian cysts that I started to get concerned about the limitations of this disorder. I was then engaged to be married when my doctor said "I can't exactly write out a prescription for you to conceive, but you might want to try soon." She explained that sometimes a pregnancy would cause the endometriosis to lay dormant for nine months and sometimes cure itself. She also said that I had the reproductive organs of a 30-year-old and my best bet for having a baby would be now. After sharing this with my fiance, he said, "What better time to try than on our honeymoon."

Well the honeymoon came and went and nothing happened. Two years later I still wasn't pregnant. My doctor referred us to a specialist to take an "aggressive approach." I was put on a low dose of clomid and worked my way up to the highest dose possible, still without results. We got a second opinion only to be told to save our money since IVF was our only chance at conceiving. To a young couple struggling to meet needs, this was devastating. While still on clomid another cyst appeared and once again surgery was scheduled to remove it. I was put on other fertility drugs after the surgery and nothing happened. By this time the holidays were fast approaching and we were draining our bank accounts on doctor visits and medications not to mention draining our emotional accounts as well. We decided to take a break from all the "action" and regroup at the beginning of the new year. It was then that I got on my knees in the bedroom that was to become a nursery, looked out the window and cried out to the Lord. I asked for patience, understanding and peace. I also asked for a baby. I felt hopeless and I couldn't imagine myself as a mother or having a baby. That night I got out my Bible and looked up the word "barren" in the concordance. What I found gave me hope, courage and patience to wait on the Lord and His perfect will.

What's For Dinner?

Chicken and Yellow Rice
(adapted from Judy's recipe)

1 1/2 to 2 lb. boneless, skinless chicken thighs
1 (5 oz) package Saffron yellow rice
1/2 cup chopped onion
2 carrots chopped
2 celery stalks chopped
2 garlic cloves, crushed
Salt and Pepper

Rinse and pat dry chicken then season with salt and pepper. Place chicken in large pot and add vegetables and garlic. Pour water over chicken and vegetables (enough to cover chicken) and bring to a boil. After boiling, cover and simmer for an hour or until chicken is cooked and tender. Drain off water, saving about two cups for rice. Chop or pull chicken apart into bite-size pieces.

Prepare yellow rice according to package using reserved water. When rice is done add chicken and vegetables and mix well. Add more stock as needed. Serve with something green! Steamed broccoli or green beans works well. Enjoy.

Wynken, Blynken and Nod

Wynken, Blynken and Nod were three little ones who set out in a wooden shoe boat to catch fish from a beautiful sea. The nursery rhyme was originally titled, "Dutch Lullaby" and was written by Eugene Field. It is a beautiful poem and a tribute to the three beautiful children I never thought I would have. I like to say I was "barren but not forgotten." In the days and weeks to come I will share my story as well as those of seven other women who found the Lord had not forgotten them nor their desires to have children. I will also share the thoughts, dreams, fears and laughs I experience daily as a stay-at-home mother of three as well as include recipes, craft ideas and any other thing I have found useful or encouraging in my quest to be the mom God intended me to be. So, forget the dishes, tune out the cartoons and catch up on the laundry later...or stop crying, put down the ovulation testing kits, and hold tight, God hasn't forgotten you either!